You know, just as I was saying I’d hope my lesson on anger management sunk in, we had another opportunity to revisit the theme 2 days later.
This time, we just had a nice time going to the local swimming pool with a friend and her 5 year old daughter. The girls were most reluctant to leave and as we were going through the turn stiles, Bea lingered a bit, looking wistfully at the waterplay area (which she had just spent the last 3 hours splashing around). I called her, since everyone had exited but she didn’t hear, so a few moments later, she turned around after I had “you hooed” her almost 5-6 times, standing a few meters away. When she saw everyone had left and I was standing some distance away, immediately, the black face came on. I could literally feel her feet itching to stamp their way towards me.
M : Stop your temper tantrum! You just had a good time and now it’s time to leave. Don’t show me your black face!
B kept quiet and a few minutes later I heard a mumbled sentence.
M: What did you say?
B: I was talking to myself.
M: What did you say to yourself?
B: I said, “I guess I can’t trust my brain.”
M: Well, it’s not the whole brain that you can’t trust. It’s the angry part. When Angry Brain comes out, Thinking Brain should take over and say, hey Angry Brain, is this the right time to be angry? If it is a silly thing to be angry about, Thinking Brain should tell Angry Brain, “Don’t be silly. You are not in charge. I am.”
B chuckles and in that brief 2 minutes, I hope she had a breakthrough on how to manage anger. I am sure there will be many more incidences to learn from but I think the important lesson that she has realised that she can remain in control when she experiences anger, the emotion can be observed – rising and dissipating with an actively thinking brain.